It was such a joy to reconnect with Dorien again, and openly discuss the complex issue of making sense of experiences that so easily get labelled and dismissed as ‘illness’ within our current psychiatric system.

Here Dorien speaks openly for the first time about the shame that she had to work through, whilst also navigating the integration journey after her crisis and extreme altered state.

During the height of her experience, Dorien felt as though she were dying, and believed that the end of the world was nigh – something that is extremely common during altered states.

Dorien now sees her experience, despite how incredibly challenging it was, as a symbolic and meaningful life transition that could have been made much easier were it perceived and supported differently. This is hugely important when considering what changes are needed in our current services.

Dorien’s experience of ‘inner polarity’ taught her that leaning into the darkness with curiosity is a necessary part of the journey to birthing love – could it be that the insights born out of such experiences are helping us to birth the new world?

If you’re experiencing a crisis right now, I hope hearing Dorien’s words will offer some solace (apologies for the audio blips along the way – we went with keeping it raw and real, as always).

Dorien added:

My guiding voice came back a little while after it led me through the Emergency. And I was afraid to connect with any of the content – would it pull me back? But this voice came back so comforting, reassuring and stayed for almost a full year, that it came on regular basis in a very assuring way.

What helped me in the beginning was to literally set an alarm, connect with my inner world with compassion and curiosity and allowing it to speak/show… but when the alarm went off: Focus on cleaning and practical stuff to ground. Learning to dose it. Alone or with a therapist, setting these times apart so it can be unpacked a little bits at a time.

It is now 9 years since Dorien’s experience, and the gradual integration process she alludes to above is what has enabled her to put the knowledge gained from it to use. Dorien is now a Level 3 trained practitioner in the therapeutic model ‘Internal Family Systems’. She specializes in holding space for people who are integrating altered states, or going through an awakening process by helping them to connect with all of who they are.

You can find out more Dorien’s work and contact her here: https://thekokon.nl/Info-in-English/